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4 December 2013 3 comments

Where is Oliver Parsons?

By Oliver
Where is Oliver Parsons?
It was right here, I swear! Note: Today's post comes courtesy of our own Oliver Parsons, Brooks' new Digital Marketing Manager, who arrived to us recently, freshly minted at one of the largest banking houses of the Empire. He is now somewhat dejected - after a very recent loss. Where is Oliver Parsons? Oliver Parsons is missing. Taken during dinner. He hasn’t been seen since. Can you help us find him? There is a reward! Well, I haven’t actually gone missing, but my B17 Special has gone missing. My B17 Special that was artistically engraved (by scissors) with my name, Oliver Parsons. In fact Oliver Parsons the B17 has not gone missing – it has been stolen! Home Engraving The saddle was secured using a variety of innovative theft prevention measures.  An oily old bike chain had been used to secure the saddle to the frame, and to save the my trousers, it was encased in an old inner tube.  This is a standard practice in London and elsewhere. But I didn't stop there.  The allen key fitting on the seat post had a strategically placed ball bearing super glued to make it impossible to remove the saddle from the seat post The thief - or it could be a collective - simply took the post too. This same procedure was used to ensure that the seat clamp could not be removed with a simple multi tool. This required me to source two ball bearings of different sizes - no mean task!  Finally there was the engraving - although for the sake of honesty, it must be stated that this feature was covered at the time of theft by one of our rain covers - the bike was parked in London after all. Those of us at Brooks want to help  find Oliver Parsons the B17, particularly me, Oliver Parsons, so we are offering a reward and we want the good people of London to look out for it. It isn’t going to be hard to spot, and unless you’re called Oliver Parsons, it isn’t an attractive item. So, if you find Oliver Parsons the B17, you can take your pick from one of our Saddles or our Utility Bag line. That’s right, one free Saddle or Utility Bag! All you need to do is find Oliver Parsons (the saddle) and bring him to our B1886 Store on Earlham Street in Covent Garden, London. Oliver Parsons in happier days – enjoying a rest in Epping Forrest We have started a campaign #FindB17OP to help you log the places the saddle wasn’t found, to save other Saddle Detectives time in their search. For those of you not based in London, we realize you might not be able to help as much, and for this we apologise. However you will be pleased to know that I was eating dinner with our Product Manager at the time and this incident has galvanized his resolve to solve saddle theft! We are all at the drawing board attempting to create the ultimate anti-theft device – watch this space! In the meantime please share your anti-theft techniques. Here are some of ours posted a few years back
My sympathies, same thing happened to me last year. I saw it for sale on ebay a couple of days later - could not prove it was mine so the police were not interested.

Please clarify something for me - did you have a bearing glued into the seat post bolt AND the saddle clamp? If so, there is no hope I will be able to hold on to my current Brooks, its theft is inevitable.
Eoghan 23 May 2016 at 16:51
I hear the Brooks theft rate in London is at disgustingly high levels unfortunately.
I have wished for years there was a lockable saddle clamp.Could the solution be a hollow bolt with an insert that has a head that covers the nuts making them immovable when the insert is in place, the insert having a basic lock tumbler system secured by a key?
Stephen 23 May 2016 at 16:51
Oliver: I think I saw your seat mounted on a Surly Disc Trucker on South Beach in Miami....it was drawing a crowd of bikini clad admirers. You may not get it back mate!
Mark 23 May 2016 at 16:51